Duits wijnfeest met masterclass

Click here for all drawings Spikes uitkijkpost

Jasmin in Canada

Granddaughter Jasmin is in Canada with Doug and Sara. While everything about this trip is on Jasmins Journal blog, I must include some of the fantastic photos and a video. In two weeks she has done everything that a 12 year old could wish for, including a flying lesson over the Niagara Falls! The following superb were photos taken by Jasmin from Doug's plane.








.. and went on the 'Behemoth' with Daniel



.... and launched a home built rocket that can reach 2 km, although Doug set the motor at a low level so that the kids would not have to chase them too far when they came down by parachute.



Video - Jasmin investigates - are the famous canals just Mars-Bars laid end to end?


Special NASA team. My goodness, Doug does have a big one, doesn't he?

Een speling van de natuur!

Sperziebonen of snijbonen?
Nooit geweten dat als je snij-en sperziebonen te dicht bij elkaar plant, een kruising van de twee kunt krijgen. Mijn vader laat altijd wat bonen "dik" worden die hij dan oogst als plantgoed voor het jaar daarna. Een enkele keer gaat dit mis. Zoals dit jaar. Tussen de sperziebonenplanten, stonden dit jaar een paar planten die bonen leverden die je geen snijbonen maar ook geen sperziebonen kunt noemen. Wel leuk zo'n speling van de natuur!

Paarden en veulens gespot

Tijdens een fietsritje door Heiloo kon ik het niet laten om even een paar foto's van de pony's en veulens van Stal Sprenkeling te maken. Ze lopen deze zomer heerlijk buiten op het land. Ook de 2 moeders met veulens, heel leuk om te zien.




En nog een filmpje van de veulens op Youtube

Opa and the mole -

Wat een reactie - net als een slang - en dat op 81!
Children - do not watch this if you like little furry animals!

Spikes Uitkijkpost

I began making drawings of things in the Heiloo-online news because it is a challenge to draw something without knowing what the story really is. And because my family find them amusing. Paul Mars of Heiloo-online presumably also likes them, and wants to put them in the news section. I shall thus put only the latest two here, and delete the older ones. They can be found by clicking on the link to Spikes uitkijkpost. Some people may ask why much of this is in English. Although I have lived in Holland for more than 30 years and have reasonable Dutch, this blog is aimed at my English-speaking family in England, Canada and New Zealand, who would otherwise spend the day with a dictionary. The Dutch part I leave to Bernadet who does it much better than I .

View from the roof.

This week I had to climb to the top of the house to put wire cages in the chimney pots. At the same time, it was an opportunity to put a homemade cap in place. I did not have enough material, so the result is a bit like a watch tower at a concentration camp, but at least it cost nothing. In the past we have had birds, mostly crows, getting into the pipes. These are 200 mm in diameter (the pipes,not the crows!), so getting in is no problem. It gets a bit more difficult when you want to get out. The pipes are smooth, so climbing back up is not an option. Flying is also not possible, especially if you are a fat bird and cannot turn round. The only way out is down, and hope that you find that the lower end is open. Two of the pipes are for ventilation of the bathroom and downstairs toilet, one for the central heating and one for the bath geyser. It is a bit scary to see beaks and claws scrabbling at the grill when you are having a shower or sitting on the toilet. It is then easy to remove the grill and let the birds fly out. Those that fall into the other pipes are not so lucky. Sadly, when trying to find the problem with the combi-boiler, we found that the thing was blocked with burnt feathers and bones.

Bolroosters are also a fashion-item

At the same time, we took the time to take a few photos of the green around us, so that we will be able to see what it was like before Zuiderloo swallows it up.

Reiger Scarer

If you have a pond and don't like nets and electric fences to keep herons (reigers) away, you may be interested in this inexpensive but effective solution. We have not lost any fish, so the method appears to work. Using a cheap 'bewegings-melder', an even cheaper disco strobe-light and a big plastic plant pot you can make a good reiger defence for about 20 euros. Reigers don't like flashing lights. You can put mirrors or hang old CD's around the pond, but they are not much use in dull weather, and do not look very nice. Reigers hunt in the early morning, or just before it gets dark, so mirrors will protect you from a reiger that is fishing in bright sunshine by mistake because he is too hungry to care, almost blind or totally mad.



I have tried to catch a reiger trying to get at the fish on film, but although they come into the garden or sit on the roof, they never come near the pond. I love reigers, but not when they go fishing in our garden.

Einde vakantie Katinka en Rosa

Gisteren hebben we Rosa en Katinka weer van het land gehaald.

De paarden hebben twee weken mogen genieten van het verse gras. Even geen meiden die van alles van hen vragen. Maar nu moeten ze weer aan de bak.
Eigenlijk waren ze heel blij dat we ze kwamen ophalen. Ze stonden op het land met een hele groep paarden en pony's. Bij aankomst kwamen ze allemaal angegaloppeerd, ze wilden allemaal wel mee naar stal. Wat een rotweer, veel regen en wind. Met moeite konden we de anderen tegen houden, nee jullie vakantie is nog niet afgelopen, jullie mooten nog blijven! Je zag ze denken, ik wil niet meer, ik wil terug naar stal. Katrien probeerde nog om met Katinka mee door het hek te glippen, maar we hadden haar op tijd in de gaten. Jammer dan...
Gelukkig wordt het de komende week weer mooi weer, we hoeven ons dus niet schuldig te voelen.

De groentetuin van mijn vader

Wat eten we vandaag?
Er is niets zo leuk als een groentetuin. Mijn vader heeft naast ons huis een groentetuin. We hoeven eigenlijk nooit meer na te denken over wat we willen eten. We eten gewoon wat de groentetuin ons schaft. Gisteren waren het tuinboontjes, eergisteren broccoli en vandaag eten we, ja wat eigenlijk? We zullen het straks wel horen. Daarnaast zijn er volop wortels, uien, aardappelen, soepgroente, sla, komkommers en binnenkort ook tomaten. En ...natuurlijk courgettes.
Courgettes zijn er de hele zomer in overvloed. Dat is soms wel een probleem...
"Ik heb ook weer vier courgettes" . "eh.. er liggen er nog 6 in de koelkast" Maar bij de meeste groentes is het zo, als je denkt nu heb ik er wel genoeg van.. dan is het in de tuin ook op.
Sinds mijn zuster helpt in de groentetuin, is er ook een deel bloementuin geworden. Dus naast ook iedere dag verse groente hebben we nu ook iedere week een vers bosje bloemen op tafel.
Geweldig.
De video van de groentetuin kun je bekijken in het frame hiernaast.



We had 9 people for dinner, and we used less than one third of this giant broccoli. The next day 10 people came and we almost finished it.

Gadgets first steps

A bit out of sequence now that he is already galloping like a racehorse, but here is a short video of Gadget's first few minutes. The film is a bit patchy because it was night.

Gadget Video en hier was hij 2 dagen oud.

Een zwaluw maakt nog geen zomer.

Maar als er zeven zijn, is het echt wel zomer! Ook dit jaar, net als de afgelopen jaren, heeft het zwaluwpaar van Stal Sprenkeling jongen gekregen. Begin mei kwam eerst de ene zwaluw terug en een paar dagen later was het echtpaar herenigd. Ze hebben een nest gebouwd, tegen de balken aan in de stal. Inmiddels hebben ze 5 jongen gekregen. Geweldig om te zien hoe ze de hele dag door de stal zoefen om vliegen te vangen. Volgens Jeannette vangen ze meerdere vliegen in een vlucht. De jongen zijn hongerig en je ziet ze groeien. Langzaamaan worden de jongen naar buiten gelokt en worden ze steeds minder gevoerd. De ouders komen met lege bek terug en de jongen beginnen hevig te protesteren. Ze moeten het nu zelf gaan redden. Op een gegeven moment hebben ze het door en vliegen ze achter de ouders aan naar buiten. Geweldig om naar te kijken. De paarden zijn ook erg blij met de zwaluwen, ze hebben veel minder last van vliegen. Een zwaluw schijnt 500.000 insecten per seizoen te kunnen opeten! Het blijkt dat de boerenzwaluwen bedreigd zijn. Meer over boerenzwaluwen kunt u lezen op Informatie over Boerenzwaluw

Een boerderij met een geschiedenis

Since about 1928 my wifes grandfather lived here.

Westerweg 411-413 Heiloo. Bernadet asked her father for his recollections:

Voor de boerderij van mijn opa (en later mijn oom en zijn kinderen) is een sloopvergunning aangevraagd. Om te voorkomen dat met de sloophamer ook een stukje tuindersgeschiedenis van heiloo verdwijnt, heb ik mijn vader gevraagd over de historie van de boerderij. De boerderij is waarschijnlijk gebouwd rond 1900, het jaar dat mijn opa is geboren. Hij begon er een gemengde boerderij met een paar koeien, aardbeien, apsperges, bonen en tulpen. Bij de boerderij zat zo'n 2 hectare grond. De beginjaren vielen niet mee. Het was aan het begin van de crisisjaren en als hij het bedrijfje niet gekocht had, was hij er waarschijnlijk van weggelopen. Het was alles behalve rendabel. De melk deed slechts 3 cent per liter, de doperwten 4 ct per kilo en een slof aardbeien (2,5 kg) leverde slechts een kwartje op.



Het waren geen gemakkelijke tijden. Mijn opa en oma kregen 12 kinderen, dus er moest wel wat verdiend worden. In de crisistijd werd er door de overheid wel steun gegeven aan deze bedrijfjes, niet in geld maar in natura. Anders zouden ze er eten of kleding voor de kinderen van kopen en dat was niet de bedoeling. Nee, je moest een plannetje inleveren en dan kreeg je bijvoorbeeld een kruiwagen met een luchtband. Dit was een hele vooruitgang. Al die kruiwagens mest die over het land verspreidt moesten worden, dit ging een stuk lichter en je kon ook meer tegelijk meenemen. Andere "kleine tuinders steun" bestond uit zaken als een mestvork, schoffel, hooivork enz.

In het stalletje achter de woonboerderij pasten zo'n 6 koeien.
De meeste boeren, zo ook mijn opa, hadden alleen koeien in de winter (Deze boeren werden opzetters genoemd). Hij had in de beginperiode maar een paar koeien in eigendom. Hij leende bij de bank dan geld voor twee koeien extra. In het voorjaar gingen die dan terug naar de handelaar en de lening werd weer afgelost. De koeien die hij in eigendom had werden ook weer verkocht. Er hebben bij deze boerderij dus eigenlijk nooit koeien buiten gelopen. Ik denk dat de grond daar te duur voor was. In de crisisjaren verloor mijn opa het recht om tulpen te verbouwen. Er was een te groot aanbod van tulpen, ze leverden daardoor heel weinig op. Mijn opa besloot daarom zijn tulpenbouw te halveren van 400 roe naar 200 roe. Daarna kwam de vereniging van bollenkwekers echter met de maatregel dat alle tulpenboeren nog maar de helft van het jaar daarvoor mochten verbouwen. De kleintjes moesten helemaal stoppen. Mijn opa had dit dus eigenlijk te vroeg besloten, want nu mocht hij dus nog maar een kwart van zijn oorspronkelijke hoeveelheid verbouwen. Daarmee was hij zo'n kleine teler geworden, dat hij geen vergunning meer kreeg. Zijn vertrouwen in organisaties had hierdoor een behoorlijke knauw gekregen. Hij vond dat hem veel onrecht aangedaan was.

Het pomphuisje

Het pomphuisje naast de boerderij is gebouwd na de oorlog. De grond rond de boerderij werd steeds droger, waarschijnlijk door de waterwinning uit de duinen. De tuinders probeerden eerst door zandafgraving de grond weer wat minder droog te krijgen. Het zand konden ze kwijt aan aannemers voor de huizenbouw. Dit bracht echter slechts tijdelijk soelaas. Want alle buurtuinders gingen hetzelfde doen, waardoor het effect weer teniet werd gedaan. Na de oorlog was er de Marshallhulp, voor de wederopbouw van Nederland. Veel tuinders in deze omgeving hebben toen subsidie gekregen om een bron te slaan en een pomp aan te schaffen, zodat ze het land konden bevloeien. op een gegeven moment werd er echter zoveel water onttrokken dat er te weinig water overbleef voor de drinkwaterwinning in de duinen. Er kwam toen een regel dat de boeren moesten gaan betalen voor het water dat ze uit de grond haalden. Dit vonden ze echter zo onterecht, dat dit massaal geweigerd werd. De regel werd toen stilzwijgend afgeschaft. Voor de drinkwaterwinning werd toen extra water uit de lek, via de zuiderzee, de duinen ingepompt.

Met dank aan mijn vader, A. Sprenkeling.

Emma interviewt Opa over zijn schooltijd - (deel 1)
Emma interviewt Opa over zijn schooltijd - (deel 2)
Emma interviewt Opa over zijn schooltijd - (deel 3)

A most interesting story. For the english side of the family who cannot understand a word of the above, I suggest you do what I did. Come to Holland, fall in love, learn the language and never want to leave it. It's the best place in the world.

July 2008 - Even horses need holidays

Katinka ('The Horse') and her best pal Rosa went to the meadow today where they will spend the next two weeks. During this time, they will not have to walk around with people on thier backs telling them what to do, nor go round and round on the end of a rope while someone swishes a long whip at them. And instead of standing all day in a desert of dust, they will be doing the Sprenkeling Survival Course.

Do you think we will survive the course, Tinka?

They will be left all alone in a very large field, with only fresh water to drink and lush grass and sweet clover to eat. "It sounds tough, but I'll do my best", says Katinka.

Never wash wool at 90 degrees

And of course, where there are horses there are flies. And where there are flies, there are swallows.

Hey! Someone just rode off on our restaurant!














I can't go with them on holiday because I'm too young. I've just been born and my name is Gadget. Thats my mum's foot behind me. She's called Flair, and I think she just sneezed all over me. I feel wet and slimy. Watch this space. There will be more photos of me as I grow up. Because I'm so cute.

June 2008 - Making it while the sun shines

There is something about living amongst horses, farms and gardens. In Beverwijk I drove to a reasonably boring job in which every day was more or less the same as the one before, and was within my control and its procession somewhat predicatable. Out here it is different. In June, for example, everyone with a bit of land will be anxiously watching the sky and the weather reports. The nervous time between cutting and baling, when all can be ruined by a summer storm. Only the very rich farms and menageries can afford to have idle for most of the year all the tractors, cutters, trailers and balers needed for this short but critical grass harvest. The smaller must do as they have always done, that is to help each other. This increases the risks as the shared or borrowed men and equipment can only be in one place at a time. For each of them, the elapsed time of the whole process is longer and the risk of rain greater. It is a joy to see how these people work together for the good of all. Your scribe also played his part in this herculean task, although his 65 year old body sometimes wanted to give up. Only the shame of doing so while the 82 year old body of Opa strode over the prairie humping bales prevented it from doing so. This is a time when everone offers to help, but its like musical chairs to see if you can find an empty seat on a tractor. If not, it's bale-humping, I'm afraid. Jan has enough land to produce 2000 bales of between 50 and 80 pounds each. They all have to be stacked on a cart, 7 high. Then back at the ranch, they must be humped off again and stacked 30 high in the hayloft. In stifling heat and with only hay-dust to breath. A lot of pressing appointments are remembered at this time. But it was done, and it was fun. There are a few pictures in the slideshow. Enjoy.

May 2008 - A scrap with Gemeente Heiloo

Onenigheid tussen ons en Gemeente Heiloo.
Deze verhaal in het Nederlands - Hier klikken.

This story, true in almost some of its elements, is born of an altercation between me and the Heiloo Village Council ('Gemeente'). Our garden was formally the car-park of my brother-in-law’s menagerie. We purchased a large chunk of ground at the side of the house and with the help of bulldozers, mechanical shovels and other sturdy appliances, turned a car-park into a garden, a process that involved the removal of hundreds of tons of rubble to the new car-park and the filling of the ensuing pit with lorry loads of good earth. However, a menagerie is, by definition, a place where horses may be expected to walk about aimlessly. Horses, including our own The Horse, do not appreciate the need to stay on one side of an unmarked boundary, especially if that boundary separates a pasture of grit and gravel (theirs) and one of lush grass, edible shrubbery and an attractive drinking-hole with water-lilies (ours). We decided to erect a pergola some 2 meters high around the perimeter of our garden, along which grapes, wisteria and passion flowers would grow and hang gracefully. Your humble servant was just completing his masterpiece when an official from the council appeared on a bicycle and explained that this ‘building’ was against the law, and construction must stop and go into reverse. The pergola apparently changes into a ‘building’ at a line one meter behind the façade of the house nearest to the street, and any building between the house and the road may not exceed one meter in height. The following I place here before translating into Dutch and posting to the council’s own website, where hopefully I can make my protest while damping the wrath of the council through humour. Our story begins with a fictitious reporter (verslaggever) approaching my good self to make sense of it all. Some puns in Dutch do not work in English.

Gemeente Heiloo Hero saves Citizens from probable disaster on Hoogeweg.

A story of one heroic council workers action to avoid armageddon along the Hoogeweg. We are today visiting a house that we have been watching with interest. A most beautiful garden has been rising from a wasteland, and we are here to talk to the owner, who has asked that his real identity not be published. We are pleased to respect his privacy and shall refer to him only as Mr. William, although his real name is William John Ricketts, English, 65, retired, resident at Hoogeweg 34, 1851PH, Heiloo. Telephone number on request.

Goedemorgen, Heer William, een hele mooie tuin hebben jullie, zeg.

Good morning, verslaggever, and that is very kind of you to say so.

So, Mr. William, you are English!

Ah, my accent of course! Difficult to hide, even after 30 years in your country!

Um.., quite, Mr. William. But I could not help noticing that the pergola is 2 meters high, everywhere except where it runs along the road, where it comes down to one meter. All the more remarkable because when I passed yesterday, it was all of the same height. Is there perhaps a reason for this loss of altitude?

Indeed there is verslaggever. I was under the impression that it was a pergola, and that is what it is, except where it crosses a line drawn exactly one meter behind the front of the house. It then changes, as if by magic, into a ‘bouwwerk’ or ‘Konstructie’. There are hidden dangers when such an object is more than one meter high, extreme dangers for people who walk along the Hoogeweg.

A very small pergola. Or a very large teenager on growth hormones.

And pray, Mr. William, how did you become aware of these dangers? It must have been very serious to go to the trouble of reducing part of it to half the original height.

It certainly was, verslaggever, but I was saved by an alert minion from the Gemeente, who warned that it was against the law, and that the law was for my protection and for others. He arrived like a superhero on a bicycle and cried ‘STOP’, just in time, before matters became critical for all of us along the Hoogeweg. Thank heavens such people are there to save us from our own stupidity!

Well, quite. Een reddende engel, Mr. William! Een ridder te fiets! And did this mannetje have a name? Our readers will want to thank him!

His name was Mister R. Spain, verslaggever.

Mister Arse-Pain?

Yes. It was on a plastic thingy, tied around his neck with a ribbon. Just like toddlers on a school trip, in case they get lost. It must be very easy to lose the way when you are cycling around looking for Evil Doings and Breaking of the Regulation that says that Things Must Not Be Too High. With such a label he can be brought home safely.

Oh, the caring mother that he has, Mr. William! But did he tell you exactly what these awful dangers were?

Not as such, but one can read between the lines, verslaggever! It has to do with international Terrorism! If an organization wanted to disrupt the Hoogeweg, they could put cameras and antennas and very small spies in such a pergola to prepare a plan! There is a VVV office right in the heart of our village!

They deal with tourists, Mr. William, not terrorists.

That’s what they want us to think, verslaggever. They have taken over a supermarket in Alkmaar. The Alki-Edah! And next year their leader may be president of America! Osama bin Leiden.

I think that’s Obama, Mr. William.

Yes, verslaggever, but we both saw through him directly! Not very subtle, is he?

Um, were there any ‘normal’ dangers, Mr. William?

Indeed there were, verslaggever. Mr. Arse-Pain mentioned that aggressive plants can take over such a high pergola along the road and attack honest citizens. The Giant Bolivian Spiky Melon, for example. If one of those jumps onto your head from two meters, you are history.

This could have been YOUR teenager - a simulated attack by Spiky Melons

Note - Tienersap also simulated

I notice, Mr. William, that the arch leading to the garden path is also, as required by the Regulation, one meter high and cannot be walked under. I myself received a painful blow to the pubic cluster when I tried to enter the garden.

'Gemeente' size portal

Most unfortunate, verslaggever, but we never walk into the garden at the front, preferring to go round to the back where the portal is two meters high.

But what about your friends who come to visit, Mr.William?

No problem, verslaggever. All our friends are male dwarfs, 80 cm or less.

Dwergen? But what about their wives, Mr. William?

The wives? Limbo dancers, every one of them. To a man.

And will the ‘Konstructie’ still function as the original pergola, Mr. William, and support plants?

Oh, absolutely. We will be using Klim Viooltjes, hanging carrots. And dwarf grapes. They must NOT go higher than one meter.

Why not, Mr. William?

Fear. They are scared of heights, verslaggever. Hoogtevrees. They are seldom seen because most pergolas are too high for them, so Mr. Arse-Pain is also helping to preserve a threatened plant sort.

A primeur! - Mr. William admires the first Dwarf Grapes

Mr. William, there has never been a terrorist attack on the Hoogeweg, nor has anyone suffered from assaults by gigantic prickly melons. Does this not tell us something? Perhaps about your mental stability?

What it tells us, verslaggever, is that Gemeente Heiloo has booked one hundred percent success in this campaign, that is why we are safe, and why we can be proud of them and grateful to their personnel. Especially to Mr. Arse-Pain. I feel so strongly about it, that I am personally prepared to examine the properties of all members of the Gemeente to make sure that they are as safe as they have made us, and that they have not overlooked any dangerous contructions in thier own gardens which may put these worthy people at risk. One good turn deserves another, as we say in your country.

If you say so, Mr. William. I notice that ‘Elzen’ trees are growing up under the new 'low ' pergola. How high can they grow, and what will you do when they are fully grown.

A good question, verslaggever. They will grow to about 160 meters, all within the Regulations, being natural and not a ‘konstructie’. I shall then hire a huge crane from Bo-Mij and saw the tops level, and then allow all kinds of plants to grow along the top at an amazing height.

Is there a name for this incredibly tall plant-support, Mr. William.

Yes, verslaggever. It is called a..... 'pergola'.

___________________________________________________________________

Mr. William has indicated that he would like to nominate his hero, Mr. Arse-Pain, for a special award in recognition of his diligent work in the enforcement of The Regulations that Things Must Not Be Too High. Perhaps in the form of a golden toilet roll.
__________________________________________________________________

Competition.

Can YOU see the difference? Send in your answer today!
Win a romantic evening in the Stadhuis with a finalist of
'Hollands Next Top Wethouder' !!!!

Bouwwerk___ ___________ Pergola

May 2008 - Cast upon the waters.

As Rob said in his speech, Pete can roam wherever he likes and there will always be plenty to drink. My gratitude to Rob, Liz, Hilde and Andrew for thier hospitality. And to Hans, Josine, Peter and Kevin for the photos and the splendid company. If any of you are in Holland we shall ensure that you feel as much at home with us.










There he goes! Pete is off to the seaside.

May 2008 - Pete's final resting place.

It has been about 8 months since Pete was cremated, since which time he has presided over a shelf in Rob's garage. Awaiting a time when enough of his old friends could or would come over to spread his ashes. For those of us who knew Pete over the last 30 years, it was with mixed feelings that we remembered him. A great friend to all, the life and soul of the pub, his party went on long after everone else had gone home. The drugs and the drink got to him and his later years were chaotic and sad. But the old Pete was still there. Even in his last days it was said that he would try to get to the pub in his wheelchair, trailing pipes and beeping equipment, and was up to a fight with anyone he took a dislike to who came within reach of his wheels. He was glad he only had cancer, because all the other people in the hospice had diseases that they could not pronounce. So off to Ireland, to the stately home of Rob and Liz, with a lawn the size of a small county, accompanied by Hilde. There, to my great joy, was the gregarious Kevin Beggin, a man who warms a room as he enters it, to entertain us with hilarious stories of the past, when we were all (in my case reasonably) young and in Amsterdam in the seventies. I did not know that Pete would be cast upon the waters of the river Sure, so my little prepared sonnet was typically not topical. I had assumed that he would be blowing in the wind from a small mountain. But since we were close to Limerick, the form of the poem is appropriate.

Some seven months after the burn,
It was asked 'What's to do with his urn?'
We'll have a fine wake,
If someone brings a rake,
Up a hill, spread him out, then return.

To begin........

This being all rather new for me, some organisation would appear to be wanting in this journal. Since we cannot alter the progress of time, I shall order things by time and under such headings as 'family', 'garden', 'clashes with the local council' etc. Not that anyone will care or ever come here by intent, but we must keep things tidy in case some poor cyber-pilgrim falls through a hole in the matrix, stumbles upon this place and is horrified to find that the blogger collects jampots and has a million photos of his/her pet tortoise in hibernation.